This is a picture of New York, New York. The foreground figure is the same person to be found in this image, and this one, and also this one. It is hard to believe the changes that time makes to an urban skyline.

That was an attempt at a joke. I realize I am not in the same league as Henny Youngman, or Woody Allen, or any of the other New York masters of the one-liner.

A doctor gave a man six months to live. The man couldn’t pay his bill, so he gave him another six months.
– Henny Youngman

Having a great deal of trouble getting back into the groove, or feeling in any way productive. I feel abnormally slow and have been attempting to understand the problem. One of the reasons is that my present work involves performing research and locating topical papers in medical science which explain aspects of brain injury.

This results in two different problems. The first involves halo effect. I find something which appears to speak directly to my issues and I am overjoyed. I now have the magic bullet that explains all the difficulties arising from brain trauma. I am so overjoyed that every subsequent document I find becomes a font of insight. Everything is printed out as a possible TAQ exhibit.

I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up – they have no holidays.
– Henny Youngman

Next, I need to review each item of research to ensure I actually understand its meaning and import. Each document is read two or three times in an attempt to fully grasp and understand the medical language. As I perform this review, the magic bullet melts away. The article no longer means what I first understood it to say. All of the prior effort, the online search, the first review, the document save, the printer transfer, the printing, the detailed second, third, and fourth reviews, is now wasted time. Multiply this time loss by ten or fifteen documents and the amount of wasted time becomes significant. My reading comprehension is slow and my ability to interpret medical text is poor and these facts are driven home with a vengeance.

The halo effect results in the downloading of documents that take time to review and which do not serve the intended purpose. I am also slowed by the fact that I am working on a series of short texts rather than working on a single long text document. My experience with long form text is that once I get started the text becomes an immersive experience. Once the first two or three pages are complete they provide a “hook” which helps me re-enter document mode the next session. Each session starts with a review and edit of the extant draft. This editing serves as a “warm up” that propels me forward into the generation of additional new text. The present exhibit writing activity is similar to a one-liner. Each item is new, there is no depth of attachment, there is no prior body of text to serve as a warm up.

I have bad reflexes. I was once run over by a car being pushed by two guys.
– Woody Allen

The other problem associated with compiling TAQ exhibits is the number of discrete pieces of paper that need to be managed. There are too many. Locating relevant research is only one half the battle. Each exhibit requires a separate cover sheet. This must be drafted and printed. The complete exhibit must then be photocopied; One copy goes to the Tribunal and the second copy goes to the opposing side. One consequence of this paper bound process is that I end up being forced to manage multiple unique paper items in duplicate. This forced paper handling multiplies the opportunity for items to go lost, or missing. Tonight I am searching for several documents which are not where they should be. This inability to stay organized, even when I take things very slowly and carefully, is extremely frustrating.
 

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This post was a break from the frustrating process of compiling exhibit documents. Taking a break is useful. I write about the issue and I gain understanding of the problem. But this increased understanding does little to improve my ability.