Woke with a shock some time before 0600. It is now 0648. Unable to return to sleep. Unable to recover the dream state apart from the fact that it had something to do with “giving up.”
I suspect I am still dealing with the after-effects of the realization that my change in photographic practice has less to do with any improvement in my cognitive abilities and more to do with a relaxation of my prior standards.
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Woke to the realization that my “progress,” as evidenced by my photographic futzing around, is a mirage, nothing more than the illusion of progress.
My prior photographic process was rigid and constrained. It had to be. I was using small format cameras and targeting the output to physical media, typically 11×17″ paper stock. Or I was targeting print publications in a CMYK colour space at 300 dpi. I have been able to abandon my prior standard process as I am now targeting digital media with 72 dpi 1000×288 pixel images in an sRGB colour space. This is a much lower standard of image quality.
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Had a flutter in my left upper arm last night. Also pain in thigh muscle. Had an event where my right hand grip was weak to the point I thought I was about to drop a full plate of food (not sure if I recorded this previously or not). Those are physical behaviours. I am also dealing with behavioural changes.
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